300407

We had a amazing basketball outing. I guess everyone enjoyed it very much. Just wanna post this youtube link online to see the wonderful Melvin doing his shocking stunt!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4f3Ku-2YyRE

280407

Today, I failed my driving test again. 3rd time in a row le... So after experiencing so many failures, what do I have in mind? Actually, I don't know leh... It seems that I am not that sad le...

Maybe cause I know that for Abraham, failures get him to where he is now. Thomas Edison failed 2000 times to get the bulb shining.



If I give up now, won't my future be deprived?



But I guess the most hurting remark is from my father: How come every thing that you did is a failure?

Actually, now I am watching Doraemon, I felt that I am similar to Nobita. Most things I am not good at, but then yet he is still happy.

260407

Somehow, today during ministry in cell group meeting, I feel that life is full of cycles. There are troughs and peaks. Ups and downs. Happy and sad. No wonder, God says that there are seasons in our life. How true can that be sia!

I today msg a person that there is a light at the end of every tunnel. But has everyone thought that there can also be a darkness at the end of every phrase of our life?

No one can avoid the darkness. Even Jesus himself can't avoid it. But how does He face against it?

"When you are in a valley, be glad that you are coming out of it."

"When you are on the mountain top, be prepared that you are going down towards the bottom."

240407

I have been awake for 1 hr and 30 mins. The thoughts in my mind have been running for the past two days.

"Oh, how much I wanted to reason with the man of God."

Are you reasoning or are you challenging him?

"If he is so capable, then do it on his own."

No one is a island. Submit under his authority.

"You seem to be very calm leh."

I am on the edge of giving everything up. Do you think I am calm?

These days, I have realised that my thoughts are fighting. And I really mean fighting. It is like a battlefield. The Word of God against my carnal thoughts. It is so scary. Thankfully, no nuclear bombs are used or else my mind gonna be a splatter. And I will be like another Robb Thompson.

One thing I have learnt so far: Don't reason for the sake of reasoning.

100407

I knelt down. I can't believe the reality. I can't believe I can't find a job. Is my job so hard to find? Are my requirements so hard to meet?

And it struck. The time at the lift. Only I. Only I can remember.

You have been by my side. Either I am doing 'funny' things or working for your glory.

You have not gone. Just that I did not feel you. I did not get to touch you. I did not get to see you. Because...

I did not pray.
I did not read.
I did not seek.
I did not knock.

I am tempted again and again to leave. To leave, yes I did consider.

When Jacqueline retorted back my statement "Taking a break is because to wanna walk further", Why then did you not take a break?

Did I not think? I am no cgl. But yes, I did consider.
I am worthless here.
It is so hard. So hard to serve.
That is what pastor says.

"It is not that their love for Christ has diminished, but they find serving God hard"

Temptations. I read in a person's blog about temptations.
Temptations come to us most often when our needs are unmet. Perhaps we can deal with being different, or even have the courage to stand alone but can you deal with loneliness? Most singles falter when faced with the depression that comes from the pain of loneliness. When lonely and single. we are hungry for fellowship. When you are hungry, you are more tempted to eat then when you are full. The need not to be alone is legitmate but how we handle that need is important.

Amazing... How do I deal with it?
But yet again, why do I think? I don't need to think.
Someone has alreadi overcome it.
How did HE overcome it?

Now when the tempter came to Him, he said, "If you are the Son of God, command that these stones become bread."

It is written, "Man shall not live by bread alone, but by every word that proceeds from the mouth of God."

and said to Him, “If You are the Son of God, throw Yourself down. For it is written: ‘ He shall give His angels charge over you,’ and, ‘ In their hands they shall bear you up, Lest you dash your foot against a stone.’”

It is written, "You shall not tempt the Lord your God.'"

And he said to Him, “All these things I will give You if You will fall down and worship me.”

Then Jesus said to him, “Away with you, Satan! For it is written, ‘You shall worship the LORD your God, and Him only you shall serve.’”

Jesus prayed for the disciples to see. And yet, we can see that temptations are common.
And do not lead us into temptation, But deliver us from the evil one. For Yours is the kingdom and the power and the glory forever. Amen.

Our flesh is indeed the agent of all temptations. That is why we need to crucify the flesh.
Watch and pray, lest you enter into temptation. The spirit indeed is willing, but the flesh is weak.”

So when we are against temptation, receive the Word and internalise the Word in your heart and show it in your lifestyle. Do not be those who hear but not act.
But the ones on the rock are those who, when they hear, receive the word with joy; and these have no root, who believe for a while and in time of temptation fall away.

Self control is indeed very important to us. One of the fruits of the Spirit is self-control. Pray for it constantly.
Do not deprive one another except with consent for a time, that you may give yourselves to fasting and prayer; and come together again so that Satan does not tempt you because of your lack of self-control.

Indeed this verse helps me and let's see the rewards for overcoming temptations.

No temptation has overtaken you except such as is common to man; but God is faithful, who will not allow you to be tempted beyond what you are able, but with the temptation will also make the way of escape, that you may be able to bear it.

Blessed is the man who endures temptation; for when he has been approved, he will receive the crown of life which the Lord has promised to those who love Him.

So, in the end, watch how He overcomes it, pray for His guidance, medidate on His Word, internalise it and act it out.

Stuck at home again!

Now those who are closest to me know that I have no job again. It is the fastest laid off period for me. To experience failures seem to be my expertise now. Failure in relationships. Failure in career. What else more for me to be a failure? I really hate this feeling. Cause I am supposed to move on and conquer new lands, and not moan over my failures. Can I help it? I am just a human.

What am I to do now? I have entered into teaching sector, admin sector, banking sector. What other sectors have I not touched yet? All I want is a job that is from 9 to 5 and pays reasonable. Izzit so tough? But somehow it seems so tough.

Job, Job ( a person's name ), am I feeling what you feel at least at the tip of the iceberg? Cause this feeling is not nice at all. But you have faith. You still can move on. Though you crumble at the end. I really admire you. I really got to be like you. To move on. And as what the Band "Chemcial Romance" sang, I got to keep on living. Nothing can stop me. NOTHING!

040407

Double-edged mind.

I realise that this friend likes to do this to me.

I don't know whether it is normal.

You arrange to go out with someone, the person agrees. Then suddenly cannot.

And the reason is : It is strange to go out just two persons, esp 2 Christians.

I agree with what Joshua Harris had written in his book: It is best not to have a outing with just 2 people. Boy n gal. It is to protect sexual purity.

I understand what the person thinks. But when you found out that the person has compromised with another person. Then what am I supposed to do? The person can go out with another guy alone, not only on a lunch but also to the movie. And I thought it is reaching out to new friends. When I after some time realised that the person is also in the church, but different cg. So What am I to make of it?

First qns: A guy can go out with a gal alone on the pretext of reaching out. The same guy cannot go out with a Christian gal alone because to protect him and her. Isn't that called double standards? Compromising to the world?


New ENtry

I found that God's words seem to be easily misinterpreted. That is why it is so easily twisted for man's benefits. For example, cultural mandate.

During bs, pastors have been saying that cultural mandate is not a permission letter granting that we are to be secular, to merge with the world. It is for us to be a light of the world, not joining the darkness.

But today, I wanna talk abt what Pastor Mark Conner shared.

There are 5 styles of connecting to God.

1) Contemplative style
2) Intellectual style
3) Serving style
4) Relational style
5) Charismatic style

For me, I belong to intellectual style.

Let's discuss each style.

1) Contemplative style

Loves solitary and times of reflection
Environment is important to them.

2) Intellectual style

Likes to being stimulated
Looks for substance in sermons

3) Serving style

Loves to be busy, making a difference in everyday lives
High challenging environment

4) Relational style

Loves to do things in groups

5) Charismatic style

Feels most excited in God's presence and sees God's signs and wonders

I can see a few scenarios of problems concerning all these styles le...

For contemplative style:

"Don't bother me. I need my time and space. I need to think over what you have said. Go away can?"

For intellectual style:

"Wait, let me see where this whole thing going to. I want to see the reasoning behind this. Then I determine what I should do."

For serving style:

"Don't ask me to talk to the new friends. I am very busy. Need to do this, do that. Later can?"

For relational style:

"Did I pray alone or do my quiet time? Hmm... no leh. No one is free leh. So cannot pray lor. Go for bible study? Cannot lah. Can I wait for people to join me?"

For charismatic style:

"I just cannot feel God's presence here in this church. Recently, I went to a new church. I want to go there. It is time for me to move on."

OR

"I think that I don't have to go to church. I can feel His presence at home. Don't have to."

What should we do if we encounter all these?


New entry

A sentence. A comment. An opinion.

It is all it takes to change A mind.

She lets me talk and talk and talk. Never showing her inner side much to me. I feel so vulnerable towards her, knowing that I and her will NEVER work out AT ALL. But all that are the past.

She has been a really good friend. How I wish this lunchbreak will never end. How I wish I can see her throughout my days here at work.

If you are reading this, you should know who you are. Since today on 4th of April, there is only 1 gal telling me that: 'S' person shouldn't go out with a guy or gal he or she likes. It will make the feeling even stronger.

Cheers, my dear friend.

030407

Many people have asked me what my new job scope is. Until now, I also don't know. Hee...

What I can say is that mine is a combination of jobs. And I am paid quite highly for this combination.

First few days, I am a payroll assistant, calculating teaching assistant's salary.
Soon after, I became a slacker, doing virtually nothing.
Then after that, I became the progamme checker. My job then is to check for any bugs or errors for a new programme.
Recently, I have rose up to become a coffee boy. To know how a new coffee maker operates.
And in addition to that, I have also become a storeman. To arrange, throw and pack the storeroom.

So can anyone tell me what my job scope is? Ha ha...